let's talk about boobs.....I mean plastic surgery....

(insert caveat about this being MY blog with MY opinions here)

this morning on the way to work I heard a commercial for a local plastic surgeon. these things run so frequently that I feel like the woman in them is a close friend whose phone number I can't seem to find or something. anyway, this mornings just about pushed me over the edge. basically she said that the plastic surgeon uncovered the real person she was like Michelangelo would create a masterpiece from a block of stone.

uh, excuse me.....wow! talk about self esteem issues if you liken yourself to a ROCK!!! don't they have some kind of psychological screening prior to plastic surgery?? and aren't you a combination of the genes passed down from your parents? so have you decided that there is something wrong not only with yourself but with your parents and their genes?!?!? and what about the idea that God created man in his image?? are you saying that he messed up somehow and didn't make you YOU??? because of course he wouldn't have given you that little crook in your nose.....oh NO!! or ears a little bigger than the norm..... oh NO! he must have been on a coffee break, right?? and of course God would want you to look smokin' hot in a bikini so he would have given you DD boobs, right???

because he gave me them.....actually they were a bit bigger, but that isn't the point here. I was also given thin hair (now with lots of grey), wide thighs, and horribly eye sight. hhhmmm....... apparently he had a donut on the coffee break while I was being made??? NO!!!! (I am really trying to put this all together coherently.....trying) the point is that we aren't all made exactly the same. it is those differences....those little quirks that Michelangelo didn't give to that block of stone.....that make us all who we are.

so I had plastic surgery. I had a breast reduction. I will tell anyone about it if they ask. I am not shy about it. I didn't do it to look prettier. I did it because it hurt and I was in pain and I thought I might suffocate my child while trying to breastfeed. (and before we go any further I will also state that plastic surgery is great for helping people who are injured, born with some deformaties, etc........it is not those people I am referring to at all in this rant). I am still very *blessed* as they say, but I don't lay down because my back hurts so much from carrying my *friends* around. I can swing a golf club now. I can cross my arms now. heck, I can even see my toes now!!! (and they need a pedicure BAD!!!)

oooohhh....and the other commercial is the mom who has had 2 kids and "now I want MY body back." uh.....no one TOOK your body....this IS your body now!!! in case you haven't noticed, your body has frequently and constantly been changing SINCE YOU WERE BORN!!! which body do you think was yours to want back?? how about the one that was a preteen that was growing faster than you could figure out how to walk and talk and you ended up looking like a newborn pony all gangly and stumbling?!?! or what about the 3 year old body....all pudgy and covered wtih strained peas?? (yeah, rhetorical question.....you want the one that looks smokin' hot in a bikini! lol!)

so ultimately what really bugs me is that the advertising ploy of the plastic surgeon. if they said "hey, annoyed because you don't like your nose??.......let's shorten it" or "don't like how you look in a bikini because all you have to eat in an entire day is a non-fat Starbucks latte and 6 cigarettes??.....no problem!" I would be fine with it. home improvements are fine......just don't tell me that there is something WRONG with the house! it is a FINE house.......or would that be ROCK?!?!?